Change is part of life.
Yet, when it’s unexpected – whether at home or work or in our social lives – it can be stressful.
The good news? Having a positive attitude can help ease tension, reduce stress and improve coping skills. Experts say the journey to positivity starts with self-compassion.
“It’s not about the rose-colored glasses and pretending like everything is OK all the time,” said Rhiannon Whalen-Harris, director of community, prevention and victim services at OneEighty, a crisis and trauma recovery advocate in Wooster, OH. “It’s more about giving the space that’s needed for all the emotions that exist, while also knowing that we can change things for ourselves. We can bring more positivity in.”
Let’s look at three ways you can do that.
Be mindful
Life’s responsibilities and distractions add up. One way to confront those challenges is by practicing mindfulness: allowing yourself to experience the present moment by pausing, breathing and checking in.
Our bodies can produce “chemicals that help us feel calm, relaxed and happy,” says San Mateo (CA) County Health. Studies show that positivity and mindfulness help get those “happy” chemicals stirring.
Ideally, a mindful moment comes early in the day, Whalen-Harris said. It helps to set the tone for everything that follows.
“When we walk out the door and the sun is shining,” she said, “instead of just, ‘All right, the sun is shining, that’s great; I’m off to my next thing,’ it’s, ‘Let me take a minute and feel the sun on my face and feel the goodness that I know exists from this exact moment.’”
Show gratitude
Lots of health benefits stem from practicing gratitude as well.
Try writing down things you’re grateful for in a journal, on sticky notes or in your cellphone. This can help improve your mood and limit negative thoughts.
The best part? The things you appreciate don’t have to be big, the University of Pennsylvania says. Whatever brings you comfort counts.
“That’s that self-compassion, being very true to yourself and coming back to a space of, ‘Even though I don’t feel great and I might feel overwhelmed, I want to take a moment to just recognize that I am fundamentally OK. I am breathing. I have food in my belly. I am safe in this moment.’
“That’s what can get us to that realistic, positive kind of state.”
Adjust your thinking
As with most things, positivity takes practice.
“If you tend to have a negative outlook, don’t expect to become an optimist overnight,” the Mayo Clinic says.
Boosting positive thinking or positive self-talk, the clinic says, begins with this rule: Don’t say anything to yourself that you wouldn’t say to someone else.
Seeking humor in everyday life – especially during difficult times – can also help you grow as a positive thinker. So can following a healthy lifestyle and surrounding yourself with positive people.
The clinic has examples of how you can reframe a negative approach into a positive one:
| From negative | To positive |
|---|---|
| I’ve never done it before. |
It’s an opportunity to learn something new.
|
| It’s too complicated. |
I’ll tackle it from a different angle.
|
| I’m too lazy to get this done. |
I couldn’t fit it into my schedule, but I can reexamine some priorities.
|
| There’s no way it’ll work. |
I can try to make it work.
|
| I’m not going to get any better at this. |
I’ll give it another try.
|
Research has shown that positive thinking can lead to health benefits:
- Increased life span
- Lower rates of depression
- Lower levels of distress and pain
- Greater resistance to illnesses
- Better psychological and physical well-being
- Better cardiovascular health
- Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease, stroke, cancer, respiratory conditions and infections
